ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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