I have demons in me.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
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