i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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