just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
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He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
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Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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