you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
soo... how was my night?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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