she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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