We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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