You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize