Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize