I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize