spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
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that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
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Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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