I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
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I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
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I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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