he puts the penis in happiness.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Who died my cat blue again?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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