To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize