Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
We were destined to go to rehab together
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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