Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
