absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
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She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
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We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
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