Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
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