it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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