remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Someone signed my nipple.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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