I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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