Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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