Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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