He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize