and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize