As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
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