I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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