She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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