She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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