Kiss
Puke
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize