I wannas sexs uuuuu
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
How does one acquire holy water?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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