I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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