The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
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Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
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Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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