she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
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I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
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I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
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