This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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