U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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