I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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