I can text with my tongue
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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