if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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