And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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