Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
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I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
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He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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