Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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