STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize