He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize