She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
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