I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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