Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize