Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
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