I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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