sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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